Monday, June 30, 2008

check this out

So me and my friend Eric are starting a novelty hip hop group... because novelty things are fun, and hip hop is fun to make fun of...

so here are the lyrics for our next single

tell me what you think

Da Debut by Da Beta Dawgs (funny hip hop name? yes!)

Yo it's the beta dawgz, embraceable
Virtually unhateable
We're definitely mateable
If something better comes along, perpetually replaceable
Yo, it's the beta dawgz, embraceable
Our girlfriends are inflateable
Our egos are deflatable
Could we win a fight with a baby? That's debatable

I went to Hogwarts, Ron was jealously mean mugging me_
Madlibs, adverb? I've gotta say thuggingly_
Suddenly I'm on the scene like Scorcese_
Went on Riddlin but it made me more lazy__

I'm crazy, haven't even ate for eight hours like Ramadon_
Cause I saw the signs like Ace of bass and Shyamalon_
More frustrating than the lost boys at Comicon_
I only watch ENG when the funny llama's on__

Jon Malon said it would be overcast like Jack Black_
At potawatomi, growing low on cash playing black jack_
Going to the store Jordan, pick me up a snack pack_
I'm on fire, call Kurt Russell, he put it out on Backdraft__

On the fast track, as if I was riding raging bull_
The sound of cash registers? beta dawgz mating call_
Gotta do wrong cause it's pretty dang cool_
See a pretty girl, wanna bang her by the pool__

I want to swim in your canal like the panama_
I wear a panorama of colors in camouflage_
I've got asthma, it's a drag like grandmamma _
I don't know when is best to stop, like banananana__

Avra kedavra, put a spell on you like screamin jay_
uncle ben before he died must have been creaming may_
Decked out in Fubu, not too much to do_
In my room, watching stuff on youtube and hulu__

Jordan's on the hunt like you're the prey and he's the predator 15_
Keep you in the paper ($) every day like he's the editor 15_
Dude will make you scream like Carl Weathers in the predator 15_
Put two things together, give them meaning like a metaphor 15__

I've got several more lines than Downey junior's mirror_
Driving down the road, getting closer to the beer store_
All up in girl's grill as if I was George Forman_Most days
I don't leave until four in the morning__

Jordan's usually snoring at about a quarter to three_
Dude gets more lady can than Chef Boyardee_
There are girls in the room getting fingered like bassoons_
While jordan's in the saloon getting blown like balloons__

A cartoon drawing cartoons, hey that's Jon Arbuckle_
I saw Sinbad on the street, I was way too starstruck yo_
I wear a hip pack, where I store my moneyclip_
My hair's slicked back and I adore a funny chick__

You can catch me channel surfing, watching TBS_
But you can also see me when I'm on Beaches like Bette_
When the waves are raging, man is it scary_
They've got me sweating them like Hayden Panettiere

Pull up a chair and rock out with your wiener out 12_
Like Skeet Ulrich, give you something to scream about 12
When I'm drinking tea, I always use a cozy 12_
Got a field of beats thicker and fatter than Rosie 12__

I'm like Barry Bonds, I get so player hated 12_
I last a long time like fruit irradiated 12_
I could kill you all as if my name was Goku 12_
Sorry if I offended you, mercy bopu 12__

The ladies think I'm hot to fantastic degrees 12_
Playing tonsil hockey, scoring hatricks with ease 12_
I don't like my ladies stocky, so no fatchicks please 12_
We're natural enemies like matchsticks and trees 12__

I glow like molten plastic, in a bowl of ashes 13_
My flows are versatile, like they're made of elastic 13_
Some people try to tell me that my flows are spastic 13_
My flows are thicker than molasses with glasses 13__

It's sunny outside like it's Bono not Bono 12_
I like the ladies more than Rosie O'Donnell 12_
Got more hip hop than the rabbits at the bunny store 13_
If I get dumped I bounce back like a bungee cord 13__

I got flows pooring out, like it was a heavy day 13_
Got the girls getting wet like after the levee breaks 13_
I'm the desperado like the Eagles or Jim West 13_
Frank Caliendo's impressions always leave me unimpressed 13__

I never wanted warts so I always hated frogs 13_
Looking at the data logs, hey it's the beta dawgz 13_
I started investing, I bought me a sweater vest 13_
I'm a pirate looking for bigger booty or better chests 15__

My flows aren't pussy, like a tabby or a calico 15_
My wee wee's not pee wee in the basement of the Alamo 15_
Put a dime in the slot, throw it in her like magic fingers 15_
Have you vagina lip syncing like you were karaoke singers15__

Thanks for listening to these raps, I commend you 12_
I hope my raps didn't happen offend you 12_
I hope that this rap wasn't too bad to listen to 12_
If you are a cute girl, I may not mind kissing you 12


1 comment:

Claire said...

You are a blog slacker.